I go to a picnic at Arlene's mother's house and get into an unpleasant situation because I dare to mention the word "evolution." The old white man in the sky continues to sit on his throne and pass judgement over people, occaisonally stopping to sign paperwork allowing the flowers to evolve. Do those forms come in triplicate?? I get surrounded by grape soda drinking homo's who want to get Cagney and Lacey on me.

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I join an online discussion group for people interested in ghost hunting and bump heads with a guy who confuses religious dogma with spiritual concepts. Churches protected by angels?? Who gets slapped down with an audio recorder.

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The founders of our nation believed that all Americans should have the right to worship according to their own beliefs, or not to worship at all. So strong was their commitment to religious freedom that they enshrined it in the first sentence of the Bill of Rights. www.firstfreedomfirst.com

Me and some coworkers head to the local steakhouse and I'm told that I'm low-class. How special !! We all make up in the end. Adventures in shoplifting. Stealing from the restaurant. (I'm innocent.) New use for paperclips. Don't debate your personal beliefs on an empty stomache. Trust me.

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I finally face off with woman at pet store about whether or not homosexuality is a choice or not....I go on date with Gerald from the pet store.....We go to a psychic and I get a past-life reading only to find out I was involved in the worlds oldest profession..

www.thesecret.tv

If you guys havent seen this film yet, buy it.

Big THANK YOU's to The Gay Trucker for taking part in this show. His blog can be found at www.thegaytrucker.com And to Tim Corrimal from www.gorainbowradio.com who GAVE me an extra Apple iSight camera he had at his house because he knew I wanted one and that I couldn't afford one. Thanks, man. You rock!! I promise not to tell anyone about the naked Scrabble games you make me play with you on webcam.

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Check out Buck Jackson's Fruitventure Radio at www.fruitventure.com

What to do when you find out your beloved pet is P.O.I. or Product Of Incest, Codename "sassy" at the pet store challenges me to prove that homosexuality is not a choice, P.O.I. birds on loose cause mayhem and scatter customers everywhere.

www.shopsmartalways.com

Two of my friends own an online jewelry company. This is the real stuff, for real good prices, and they're registered at the Better Business Bureau. I'm passing it along because a few people have asked me for the website address.

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Check out Buck Jackson's Fruitventure Radio at www.fruitventure.com

Arlene's aunt Mary goes on a hunger strike to protest war and starts giving away all of Disney's secrets.......Gay iced tea........Someone page Captain Eo........Secret underground tunnels and code purple alerts......

Consider hosting a movie night in your home....Rent "Who Killed the Electric Car," and find out how General Motors and Big Oil squashed your chances of owning the "green" car of the future right now. Visit www.whokilledtheelectriccar.com

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Check out Buck Jackson's Fruitventure Radio at www.fruitventure.com Arlene is petsitting her bosses evil monkey and invites me to tag along......Rubber spoons as personal weapons.......Whiskey and scotch soaked into carpet.......Sneaky monkey games......Would you like a slice of pear??......Where the hell are Arlene's car keys??

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I strike up conversation with woman at Starbucks about the possibility of UFO's and their occupants being real, and the conversation turns Biblical.  Can I have a chocolate latte??..........Armed robbery leads to finger pointing.....White employees suspect the only non-honky around......Bible clutching.......What to do if an alien rings your doorbell.....Does anyone have a snowbrush in their trunk??.......(Nobody was anally probed during the making of this show, human or otherwise.)

Some guy makes a gay joke at my expense while shopping at Old Navy, which leads me to wonder about how easy it is to tell I play for Team G.  I send out emails to friends and family asking them to identify any traits I have that scream "queen!!" out loud.  I got what I asked for.  Did you know  there's a "gay" way to handle silverware??  Come listen and hear about all of the things you're already doing that force your co-workers to call you Big Susan behind your back. 

Another dating adventure, this time with a guy I met online who reveals his secret Spider-Man fixation and ability to compare people to eagles and pigeons, the two types of men he groups us all into.........Late night McDonalds.........Yahoo Messenger lies and my sweet revenge.......I'm a nice guy, honestly!!